@ Andrew Kirk

An 'unconscious' stream of thoughts, ideas and comments - not too serious!! Music and sport are my main passions so they feature heavily.

Thursday, March 10, 2005

How hard is it to say goodbye...

I spend my life dealing with words, helping make sense of them, helping people make sense of them, giving those jumbled combination of letters some meaning and perhaps some truth and power. But tonight, as I have done before, I was left empty and unsure if words can live up to the expectation of an experience created in our minds - or maybe I lack the conviction and commitment to deliver those words.

Two of our closest and dearest friends are off to do the London thing and tonight we had a quiet dinner at some Bavarian cafe in the middle of nowhere (the pork knuckle was sensational).
This would be the last time we would laugh at each other, share a silly childhood story face to face, a story told a hundred times before, and talk utter hoo ha for at least 2-3 years. Now it's not like we talk everyday, or even every week but its comforting to know that they are a mere 3 iron away from a round of golf, or a twist of a James Squires from the latest discourse on the Wallabies.

But the fact is they are going far far away... back to the motherland. So when it came to saying goodbye it was a quick shake of the hand, a pat on the shoulder and a "see ya mate - don't freeze ya balls off - email me" type routine. As I walked back to the family wagon I realised that for me it was supposed to be significant, it was supposed to be a little emotional (in that rather blokey aussie male type of way) it was supposed to be at least, well at least something! But it was just an empty feeling, another missed train station in the trip of life - that if you had stopped, stepped off and had a look around you might actually have enjoyed it (just like Fassifern station).

As I climbed into the kids cab my wife looked at me and said "you just act so casual, i bet you are now saying you should have said this or you should have said that - go write that in your blog thingy..." and once again she was right.

Whether or not I learn from it... well, that's another story... he is here for another week and i have a couple of Squires in the fridge, super 12 is on TV and the fairways look forgiving.


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